Training class is driving me positively insane. I don't like changes in my routine unless I make them. I hate not being in control. Case in point, lunch is supposed to be at 12:30. That was decided by vote weeks ago. 12:30 gets here, and the trainer says we're going to keep going for a bit. NO. NO, DAMMIT, NO. And there's nothing I can do but start rocking back and forth in my chair, OCD alarms blaring, muttering to myself silently in my head, "Lunch at 12:30, definitely at 12:30. Lunch now. I should be at lunch now. Lunch at 12:30, it's past 12:30, definitely past 12:30." I need to eat, I need to smoke, I need private time. I need to get away. Nothing in the day is more important than lunch! Whatever is being talked about, drop it now, lunch now, we'll pick it up later. It's review anyway, I know this stuff, can I just cut out now? I wish this were like college where I could opt to only show up for the tests and if I passed then I passed. There's so much monotony, so much repetition. Hearing the same stuff over and over and over and over and over again is making me lose my mind. And what's worse? What's absolutely dreadful? Hearing someone else in class say, "Wait, what was that?" ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? We've been over the same shit 20 times.
I just had a very amusing (to me) mental image of a mash-up between Lord Of The Rings and Silence Of The Lambs. Gollum, as Buffalo Bill, leaning over the pit, looking panicked, it pans down to the girl holding Precious, the dog. Gollum says, "It puts The Precious in the b (Read More)
I am in desperate need of the catharsis one experiences upon slitting someone's throat with a razor-sharp blade followed by the joy and elation obtained from watching the life drift from their eyes turning them to dead, glassy orbs as I am filled with the energy that used t (Read More)
I rushed out of work at 5pm
Plopped my ass in my car again
Welcome to the land of lazyness,
hey, gotta get my rest in.
Started up the car
headed home for my free time
Look at the street and I see a really bad sign.
Traffic looks so crazy
Everybody's in my way, s (Read More)
I envy a person who can hear their alarm go off, turn it off, and get up out of bed, ready to start the day. I live by the snooze button. It is my best friend in the morning. Well, it and my coffee. I'd marry it if congress would hurry up and pass that bill legalizing m (Read More)
So, my car's wrecked, I told ya that. The bumper was precariously attached. It began to become unattached. I'll fix it with some Gorilla Glue just as soon as the snow is gone and the temperature is more moderate. For now, I removed it and placed it on my porch. So the (Read More)
The last few weeks have been kind of hectic and draining. Last Wednesday I wrecked my car. Hit a patch of ice, slid off the road, down a hill, into a pole. I wasn't hurt. The car was. I spent nearly a week with my brother-in-law trying to fix it. Had to replace the ra (Read More)
Depressed. And I'm quite tired of being depressed. There's no reason for me to be depressed. No logical reason, anyway. I'm insane, that's obvious. I have great friends. What's left of my family, my sister, brother, nephews and niece, et al, are wonderful. I'm w (Read More)
